Celebrating love is wonderful. But what can sometimes happen is that two people don’t show their love in the same way. There’s a body of work that shows that there are in fact five different ways to show love. And if your love language isn’t the same as your partner’s, expressions intended as loving can be missed, misinterpreted, or even seen as controlling or self-serving. The types of way people show love include:

• words of affirmation
• acts of service
• quality time
• giving and receiving gifts
• physical touch

I can think back to relationships where my love language and my partner’s didn’t match. I show love through quality time. My partner showed love through gifts. Eventually his gifts felt to me like he was trying to buy my love. Not understanding that the gifts were how love was shown set our relationship up for failure.
Another common pitfall is if one partner uses physical touch to show love; if this isn’t your love language it can feel predatory and uncomfortable. Especially if it is a woman on the receiving side.
Knowing your love language can help you in relationships, not only with romatic partners but with your children or friends.
Take the test here.

It’s almost Feb. 14th and whether you love or hate Valentine’s Day, the world could use a lot more love!